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what the frank
layout by Rae
baby got back
* * LAURIE! * *
I'm Laurie. I have hair that makes Richard Simmon's hair looks good. I like giraffes and monkeys. I especially like monkeys. When I was born, my dad said I was either a boy or the ugliest girl alive. It's things like that that makes my self-esteem so high these days. I like a mixture of music from Tool to Weezer to Billie Holiday to Flock of Seagulls. I have an extreme love for the 80s that will never cease. I think I've seen The Breakfast Club about thirty eight times, even though I only like parts of it. Emilio Estevez is my boyfriend. I have a lawn gnome named Clyde. He's dear to my heart. Bruce Willis sings stalker songs to me at night. I watch TV a lot. I love movies to death. I hate the feeling, sound, word, thought of fleece. My nanny gave me a fleece sweater awhile ago. I like the smell of gasoline, freshly cut grass and chlorine. I like when my skin smells after I get out of the pool. I tend to bite my nails too much so my nails are gross and short and creepy. I can't stand having bumps in my hair. I have to have music. I cry during scenes like the ending of Revenge of the Nerds. Unpixelated Sims is funny, and kind of creepy. Laughing at drunk people makes for good times. Claire is my sex monkey. You just wish you were, too. I'm not on crack, although you'd think I was.
* * * LINKS
Shannon, Josie, Emma, Zach, Steph, Julia, Betsy, Gemma
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* * * * Saturday, August 31 * *
I went to Ashley's today. She called when I was sleeping. I called her back but she was gone. Finally, we talked on the phone. She came to pick me up around 2 pm and we went to the variety store to pick up some candy: Warheads, Twinkies, pop, Reese's PB Cups, etc. Junk food. Then we went back to her house and watched Deuces Wild which was really good and really sad. STEPHEN DORFF IS SO SEXY!!$%!@% Then we watched some crappy movie called Magic in the Water with Joshua Jackson. I dunno, I wrote down our inside jokes because I knew I wouldn't remember them when I got home.
"Action Jackson"
"Indian in the garage!"
"DON'T PUT COOKIES IN YOUR NIGHTGOWN! THEY GET ALL CRUMBLY AND YOU'RE WEARING WHITE AND AHHH!"
"Poor ugly girlfriend..."
"Fish lips!"
Had to be there, I guess?
Going out to Pizza Hut with Nancy and the family. Tomorrow is the Stoked concert. I'm exciteD@! Also because I gots something up my sleeve!! :D
* You're so silly, Nanny! 5:03:25 PM * * *
* * * * Friday, August 30 * *
i didn't know how perverted fenix tx was until i read some of their song lyrics. like i didn't even GET "threesome" until julia pointed it out to me. shows how retarded i am. i sing lyrics but i don't sing the right ones. and i just don't seem to comprehend.
prince came on the radio today. my mommy and i cranked it. it was the very best moment ever today.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 10:40:28 PM * * *
1. [spell your name backwards] eirual
2. [where do you live?] canada
3. [describe yourself in 4 words] nerd hyper social food
4. [ever been to belgium?] nope
5. [what's your favorite coin?] i guess the toonie
DESCRIBE YOUR...
9. [wallet] i lost it :( it was such an 80s classic
10. [brush] pearly blue with white bristles
11. [toothbrush] green and white
12. [jewelry worn daily] belly button ring, hemp necklace, some gold ring
13. [pillow cover] i dunno, i change mine everytime i remember to
14. [blanket] a quilt that has stars, little boys, cars and just a bunch of random cool pictures and patterns on it
15. [coffee cup] i don't drink coffee
16. [sunglasses] mah! my mommy stole mine
17. [cell phone] --
19. [handbag] weird coloured messenger bag that carries everything i need to carry
20. [favorite top] currently, my old navy one :D but i have many
21. [favorite pants] my gray old man ones
22. [cologne/perfume] probably some body spray i used in grade eleven
23. [cd in stereo right now] men at work, i think
24. [tattoos] --
25. [piercings] ears & belly button
26. [wearing] gray old navy shirt & slippery wally world shorts
27. [hair] messily tied
28. [makeup] nada
WHAT/WHO (is/are)...
29. [in your mouth] my fingernail
32. [after this] probably my jones soda bottle
33. [talking to] nobody, i'm feeling antisocial for the moment
34. [eating] my lip
35. [do you like candles?] yes
36. [do you like hot wax?] i dunno
37. [do you like incense?] no
38. [do you like the taste of blood?] haha i dunno
41. [person you wish you could be with right now] lots of people
42. [what/who is next to you?] my bottle and a fan
44. [do you believe in love?] yes
* You're so silly, Nanny! 10:38:49 PM * * *
I'm not fit to throw this thing out. I know, I know. I'll completely eat humble-pie but I think she knew all along I didn't want to do it. And I sigh. But whatever. Last night was great, sleeping over at Jen's. We went to Old Navy first, and I bought a cute little gray shirt that says: "Grand River Farmers Market Fresh Every Day" and I love it. Then we drove back home and Julia came over after we ate old school Kraft Dinner, haha. Not really old school. Then we watched some TV until the VMAs came on. They were pretty good, I guess. I hate Avril Lavigne. She's now "the pride of Canada"?? Frig that. After that, we watched the tape of Big Brother that her mom had taped the same night (while we were watching the VMAs) and then Julia left. I dunno, we were like freaking out all night. Throwing hemp necklaces, taking pictures of StubTeeth (so creepy), having fake seizures, screaming at Michael Jackson, yelling at Avril Whoreface & random stuff. Then we went to bed watching Selena.
Today, I got picked up at one pm. My mom and I drove around doing errands, but I stayed in the car since I was in my pajamas and my hair was screwed over. Then I came home, had a shower, cleaned off half of my collaged wall while talking to Sex Monkey (Claire) on the phone. We figured out our futures. She's going to be an orthodontist in Ottawa, and I'll be her secretary. I was excited until I got off the phone when I realized how much of a crappy, unrealistic plan that is. Hee. Had supper with the family. My dad put sour cream dip on my face. Normal. My mom had to drive Brad into town, so I followed her around. We went to Liquidation World (I hate that store, it's so big and creepy) and Giant Tiger (Hi Denise, haha) and Wally World. I bought socks, some Jones Soda and a new bra. I love buying new bras. It's so pretty! Anyway, Scott leaves on Monday. It's kinda scary. He's packing. I'm moving into his room the next day probably, hehe. I'm listening to screamy Dashboard.
I'm going to get my G1 on either September 7 or 8. I WILL. No more excuses. Nothing. I need to get it NOW. I'm such a disgusting slacker and I hate it about myself. I'm really getting myself hyper about school. Wheee. I'm such a dork. Hardly anyone wants to go back and I do. I want to see new faces. And make fun of them, hee. I'm so mean but I'm like the cattiest person ever. It's not a very attractive trait, I'm like a young Joan Rivers. How sad. I hear there's like five new grade twelves. Hmm. And I saw Dayna today at cash at Independent. It was a nice surprise. My mom was giggling about a Cosmo caption that says "Ways to Make Him Scream 'O Canada!'" Haha. Dirty.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 10:05:59 PM * * *
* * * * Wednesday, August 28 * *
hahaha, i was just reading shannon's blog and it mentioned ricki lake's topic today. julia and i were watching the exact same one! hee. but anyway, i'm talking to katrina. and daaaaaanG! that chicken last night was good. i think i fell asleep around 2:30.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 2:05:48 PM * * *
i can't sleep. julia's fast asleep. why can't i just FALL ASLEEP? i'm so hungry, i think i'll go have some cold chicken. mmm.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 1:56:47 AM * * *
* * * * Tuesday, August 27 * *
Yesterday, "King of Wishful Thinking" came on by Go West and I serenaded my mom in the mall. Then I noticed the Ricki's sign, from an angle, looked like it said PENIS. I like doing the robot with Julia to "You Spin Me Around." That rocks. We rock it out. To the max. Which is BOSS.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 8:21:30 PM * * *
Julia's here. She's drinking Barq's. Today we went downtown, walked, sat, drank, insulted, screamed, laughed, and talked to Bah and Dan. Which is all very random to think about it, but it's our town. We both started singing "Our house! In the middle of the street!" when reading what I wrote, ha. DO THE JUSTYNE LAUGH! :D And my witch laugh. Ha, we went to my old school and being the ultimate crackheads we are (seriously, we were being REALLY loud and REALLY hyper), we attracted the attention of some little punk kids. They yelled at us, I screamed at them. Until I realized an old man watching. Then I humped a green stoned triceratops. Julia has proof in the form of pictures. After that, we rid of my rollerskates :-( And ate chicken at my house. Now we're listening to oldschool Gowan. I'm really cackly today. I have a David Hasselhoff desktop. We're listening to Snow. She's drawing our band which is named Prosthetic Cows. Hee. Don't ask how that come to be. But it did. And we love it. Haha, Julia just said "can't" in a weird British accent. I'll scan the band picture later. Off to dance to Hall & Oates.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 7:40:37 PM * * *
I went Goodwill shopping yesterday. After a long search, I found an old beige Jamaica shirt, some community service shirt, a plain v-neck green shirt and a bright pink hoodie. Then we went to Wally World for school supplies. I amused a lady because I dictated my mother on which pencils suck a lot, and which ones actually work well. Yes, well. At least I have a purpose in life now. But anyway, then we searched for school shoes. I hate my old pair, they're comfy but wearing thin and they're too clunky-looking. So we then went to the mall. Nothing. I found a dream pair ($60) in Winner's but we kept looking. Found some pair in Sears that I decided on easily -- I was too tired and sore to care. She's like "Are you sure?" And I practically yes three times at her.
Stayed up to 3 a.m. last night watching crappy TV with Scott. Things like "Elimidate" and some late night shows that nobody but us losers watch, ha. Julia's coming over today hopefully. I'm going to have a bath to shave my horrible furry legs, then have a quick shower after to get these stupid knots out of my horrible furry hair. I make myself sound like a hairy beast. I'm so excited about school! Claire, Aimée, Candice and I had THE funniest conversation possible last night on MSN. It was so disgusting and dirty and hilarious. I was like crying, reading it. It basically revolved around how Claire is our sex monkey. And if she doesn't make the monkey noise for us, I'm going to scream "CLAIRE IS MY SEX MONKEY!" down the school halls. And I will too. She knows it. Muah.
I feel like yelling "HEY ABBOT!" like in Robin Hood: Men in Tights. Hee. I have to pee and run my bath. Hey! Julia and I can finally start working on our zine after like a week of no productivity. Wheee. And Pimpy can be returned to her! :D This is fun.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 11:35:36 AM * * *
* * * * Monday, August 26 * *
Hee. He was from Encino Man and I loved him. Mad props to here.
I'm in love with Jude Law
I'm sad because I need to talk to Julia. Is she sleeping over? And then I realize she can't get to call me because I'm online. Hmm. I suck.
Sometime this week a new personal section about me is going up. When I get the time to do it.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 8:43:42 PM * * *
* * * * Sunday, August 25 * *
I love "This Bitter Pill" by Dashboard.
School shopping tomorrow. I'm excited.
My mother's forcing me to apply at McDonald's. But then again, so is Jen.
I love Smallville. I hate you, Rae, and your dirty Ethan-hair thing. You suck.
* You're so silly, Nanny! 11:51:20 PM * * *
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